It's still hard to get my head around. I've been with Terri for nearly six months and we're still going strong. My longest relationship before her lasted a matter of hours and that was only because someone needed to be with her at the hospital until her mum could arrive. I can't believe how lucky I am to have found Terri. 

I was not spending as much time at the gym as I once did, since I was getting plenty of exercise elsewhere. But whenever I was there, Terri was on my mind. We met at the gym. We didn't exactly hit it off at first--I was bumbling and she was insecure but somehow we overcame that. 

I wanted to do something special for her; our sixth month anniversary was in just over a week's time, but I was coming up blank. Even the mindless bike riding wasn't getting me anywhere. 

"Hi, John, I haven't seen you here in ages." 

"Oh, hi, Sam." I didn't stop peddling. I didn't even glance at her. If I looked her in the eye she would have me signed up for one of her charity events or something before I could blink. 

"Where've you been?" 

"Oh, you know, work and with my girlfriend." 

"Oh, right. Well, there's a fun run next Saturday. You know, there's still time to sign up." 

"Sorry, it's a special anniversary, I've got plans." 

"Oh, right. Well, maybe another time, eh?" I felt her sticky, grabbing fingers on mine and looked up for a split second and met her simpering gaze. 

"Yeah, maybe." I wanted to shake her hand off mine; she freaked me out. Not an ounce of fat or a womanly curve on her. Urgh. It made me squeamish. I let out a gentle sigh of relief as her fingers moved and I sensed her walk away from my bike. I peddled all the harder then, my thoughts fragmented. I still had to think of something good to do for Terri, something special. 

"Hey." Terri sat on the bike next to me and began to pedal. 

"Hey, you," I smiled back, "how're you?"

"I'm alright, but it's been a hard day. I'm not going to be here long tonight. I'm too tired for it. How're you?" 

I watched her beautiful flesh bouncing as she cycled in place. My Terri was all womanly curves and I could watch her work out all day. Well, maybe not all day--I'd have to have her eventually. 

"I'm alright. Just going to do another mile, then I'll warm down and have a shower. Want me to come home with you? Give you a rub down?"

"As tempting an offer as that is, John, I'll have to say no. I need an early night. I've got to be in at eight tomorrow, sorry." 

"Oh, no problem," She sounded tired, her voice distant. She had a lot on her plate at work, though, so I understood why."We're still on for tomorrow night, yeah?" 

"Yeah, I've got the table booked already." 

"Okay, good. I can't wait." 

She didn't reply straight away and when she did it was just to tell me she was moving on to the hand bike. She was worn out, I could tell. I really had to think of a good surprise for that anniversary. 

It wasn't until I looked up at the notice board as I leant against that wall to stretch out my muscles that the idea struck me. I thought it out as I showered and cycled my way home and decided it was just the right thing. She'd love it. 

* * * *

I could not believe it had been six months or so that I'd been putting myself through the gym torture. Granted, I felt better for it. I was more flexible and filled with energy, but I was not seeing my curves fall away in any significant manner. And of course, the curves that were going were the ones I wanted to keep! My bra had gone down a size and my hips seemed to have shrunk, but no amount of concentration seemed to make my podge of a belly disappear. 

I persevered, though, mostly because of John and partly because of Mum. She had bought me the stupid gym pass in the first place and I've always been told it's rude not to accept a present graciously. 

It wasn't so bad. At least the gym held good memories for me, and with John around I always had someone to talk to while working my bum off. I could look at him lustfully, too, and then take him home to have my wicked way. Although, he was perfectly capable of having his wicked way, too, come to think of it. He might have been a virgin when we first met, something I still found unbelievable, but he soon got the hang of things. And oh, he was imaginative. He kept me satisfied, but paradoxically that only made me want him more. I wanted to find out all the ways we could orgasm together. 

I was lost in lurid fantasy as I pushed the door of the gym open. The usual mix of sweat and antiperspirant products mixed with hot plastic and rubber greeted me as I walked in. That was not what surprised me. What did surprise me was seeing my John talking to the stick insect. 

It was a gym. The place was filled with lean, mean, perfectly-formed female bodies, but there was one I disliked more than all the others put together. I'd discovered from the simpering of her friends and her personal trainer's barked instructions that her name was Sam. But in my mind she remained the stick insect. She was as thin as a rail and beautiful with it. She had bright, natural blonde hair and sparkling eyes, and although I beat her hands down in the cleavage department hers was pert and always peeped out the top of whatever sports ensemble she was wearing. Men would literally drool down themselves when talking to her. 

Jealous? Me? Well, okay, maybe I was just a little bit. She was everything I wasn't. She was effortlessly gorgeous and instantly charming. Most of the men in the gym wanted to fuck her and half of the women, too, but up until that moment I was sure that my John barely even realised she existed. He loved big women, real women. He adored my curves and told me that at every possible moment. He begged me never to lose them and I told him I couldn't if I tried. And boy, was I trying. 

But at that moment my world shattered. I couldn't hear what was being said over the noise of the packed gym but her eyes were full of lust and he was pointedly not looking at her. Why on earth would you not meet the gaze of a person, unless you were trying to hide something or you were feeling guilty about something? I saw exactly what a moment later, when she covered my John's strong hand with her own thin, little dainty one and squeezed. He looked up at her then and smiled. She walked away. 

I was stunned. My John had been captured by the stick insect. I carried on across the gym and took the bike beside him. I was still in a daze. He talked to me as if nothing had happened just seconds before. Another sure fire sign of his guilt, I thought. I had been ravenously horny as I walked in the building, but when he asked if he could rub me down I had to decline. I had to get my head ‘round this weird situation. 

I couldn't get out of the date for the next night. I'd booked the table in advance and if we didn't show, my card would be charged for an exorbitant amount. Maybe we could sort the whole mess out over dinner. 

I couldn't sleep that night. All I could see was her, touching my John. I tried to explain it away, I tried to think of a rational explanation, but every time I just came up with worse and worse scenarios. What if they were seeing each other? What if they were fucking each other? Damn! John could compare my body with hers. The thought disgusted me. There was no way I could compare to her. 

* * * *

I knocked on her door promptly at seven o'clock. I had made a special effort not to be late. I knew how much that infuriated her. I didn't want to annoy her before the evening had even properly started. She had so much on her plate at work that I knew the stress boiled over into her private life sometimes. In the gym the night before, she'd seemed very stressed indeed. 

She opened the door a few moments later. 

"Oh hi, it's you. I'm not quite ready yet." Without another word she turned her back and ran upstairs. I walked in and closed the door behind me. I was baffled. Normally I'd receive a kiss and a cuddle, maybe even more. She had never bolted like that before. 

I went to sit in the living room. I wanted to follow her upstairs, but there was something about her demeanour that made me feel I would not be welcome. It's fair to say that I don't have much experience with women. Before Terri, I'd only had a few dates. She was the first woman I was, you know, intimate with. Over the past few months, I'd learned a lot about Terri, her moods, and how to treat her right. 

She was very patient with me. She had to be, I was a bumbling virgin idiot at first. With practice I got better at it, like riding a bike you could say. Not that I'd compare Terri to riding a bike. No, she was special. I loved her. I would have done anything for her. So, I sat quietly in the living room and waited. A little apprehensively, to be honest. She seemed upset and life had taught me that I was very probably the cause of her mood. 

"Come on then," she said, as she walked in, "We've got reservations for ten minutes time."

"Okay," I jumped up and reached out to take her hand, but she had already turned on her heel and entered the hallway. I followed her meekly out. As she began to stride down the road I asked her how she was. 

"Fine," she replied, not offering anything more. I asked her how her day had been. 

"Fine," she said again, not even glancing at me. 

By that point, I was certain that something was very, very wrong. I tried to work out just what it could be. My heart felt as if it was in the painful grasp of a tightening vice. I sensed I was about to lose the best thing in my life. Terri was my all, and the idea of her breaking up with me scared me to death. I didn't know what to say, though. Every time I tried to think of something to say that would make things better, I only came up with stupid questions and clichéd platitudes. I sucked. I had known it was too good to be true, that no woman could have put up with me for long without growing to hate me. Now, it seemed my theory was proven. 

We got to Alfonzo's just in time. The waiter took us straight to our table, past those who were waiting for one to come free. They could end up waiting for a long time. Alfonzo's was always popular on a Friday night. It served good food at a very fair price, a rarity in the restaurant business. We barely said a word to one another as we perused the menu. Terri ordered the lasagne, further proof she was upset about something. She takes great comfort in pasta and melted cheese. I ordered a steak and a salad. The waiter busied off to do whatever magic it is that gets our order made into something we can eat. Silence fell at our table. 

All 'round the room, people were talking and laughing. There was music underneath the buzz of voices, but you could barely hear it over the laughter and general joviality of diners enjoying a Friday night treat. Terri wouldn't even look at me. She was fiddling with a paper napkin on the table in front of her. I just couldn't take it any longer. I had to break the silence and let all hell break loose. 

"What have I done wrong?" I guess I could have just asked what was up, but I was convinced I was the problem and I wanted to find out how I'd managed to ruin what had been such a good relationship up ‘til that point. 

"Nothing," she answered with a shrug and a sigh. 

"No, Terri, there's something wrong and it's more than just work. What is it?"

"I said nothing," She hissed, her brows knitting."Let's just enjoy our meal, like all the other people in here."

"I can't enjoy a meal when you're radiating anger and disgust, Terri. I've hurt you, I know it. I don't know how I've managed it, but I want to make it better. I love you." 

I could feel tears pricking at the backs of my eyes; I'm such a wet blanket. But I did love her and the idea of losing her over, well, God knew what? It scared me half to death. 

"You really don't know?" She huffed and crossed her arms across her lap. 

"No, I really don't know. If I knew, I'd apologise for it and beg forgiveness. I'm a pillock, I know that--but I do love you and I'd never intentionally hurt you."

"You really don't know, do you?"

"No, I really don't."

Terri sighed and shook her head."Alright, I'll tell you what's been bugging me." She moved her hands from her lap onto the table, the fingers still interlaced together."Last night I walked into the gym after an exhausting day at work, really looking forward to seeing you and relaxing. But what do I see? You with that string bean of a blonde, holding hands and looking meaningfully into each others' eyes. You were flirting with the stick insect! It broke my heart."

"No, oh no, Terri, I couldn't, I mean I wouldn't I mean. . . ewww." I struggled to complete a sentence. My mind was so filled with shock and surprise. The waiter brought our food just then and it gave me the moment I needed to get my thoughts straight. 

"Sam was asking me to do another one of her stupid little fun run things and I said no. Yes, she touched me, but it was sheer fear and disgust you saw in my eyes. Terri, trust me, I couldn't wait for her to go. She freaks me out. She's all skin and bone. Yuck! You know I like real women, Terri, you know I only have eyes for you."

* * * *

He looked sincere enough. He was looking straight at me, he'd not even taken a bite of his food--but how could I be sure? 

"But she's way hotter than me, John. I'd understand if you fancied her."

"No, no, Terri, oh please, no. I can't even imagine what it would be like to kiss her, let alone…ewww, no, no, no. I love you Terri, I want you, no one else. No one." 

If he was lying, he was doing so very convincingly. His face crinkled up in disgust and I saw real affection in his eyes when he talked about me. 

"I love you, too, John, but please don't lie to me. It's happened to me too many times before. Men always leave me for a prettier girl . Ever since Patrick Delaney in junior school, who gave up sitting next to me in the dining hall to sit with Kelly Stanton, the skinniest, prettiest girl in our class. They've all left me for someone better."

"No, Terri." John reached his hand over the table and covered mine with one of his, "They we're just stupid boys who gave up on the best. I'll never do that, never." 

I had tears in my eyes, and when I looked up and saw the sincerity written over John's face, one escaped and ran down my cheek. He lifted his hand and gently rubbed away the wetness with the side of his thumb. 

"You should have said something yesterday, Terri. I'd have put you straight then. I'm so sorry I've caused you pain."

I sniffed, and smiled as I moved my hand to cover his on my cheek."It's okay. I'll spank you later for being a naughty boy."

He laughed and raised one eyebrow, "Promises, promises!"

The tension left us; the air was cleared."I do love you, John. I'm sorry for jumping to the wrong conclusion."

"It's alright, it's sorted now." John stuck his fork into his meal with gusto."Let's forget it and eat before our food goes cold." 

"Good idea." I hadn't felt particularly hungry. The emotional wrangle had exhausted me. But as soon as one creamy, meaty bite hit my lips I discovered I was ravenous and destroyed the rest with gusto. John picked up the bill and we walked out, hand in hand. 

I would give him another chance. He seemed genuine and I prided myself on being able to pick up on a liar a mile off. Even if he did fancy her. He had denied it, but I wasn't so sure. She was the female version of him. How could he not be attracted to her? He had definitely done nothing with her and that was the main thing. I could forgive an attraction to a person; it's a natural thing, after all. But I would never forgive him if he actually acted on that desire. How could I? Every time he touched me and my less than perfect body, I would know he'd be comparing it to perfection. I wouldn't be able to live with the shame, even if he could bring himself to touch me again. 

"So, I'm coming back to yours, right?" 

John's voice cut through my thoughts and I nodded. 

"Yeah, if you want to." 

"Please," he smiled, "I'd like that." He squeezed my hand. 

"But you're going to get your punishment, just like I told you first, naughty boy."

"You're going to spank me?" 

"Yes."

"Well, I guess I deserve that." He grinned and leant down to kiss my cheek."I'll do my best to take it as a man, Terri, don't hurt me too much."

"Oh no, I plan on hurting you just enough, love, but if it gets too much you should be able to scream a word to stop it all. How about ‘gym'? That seems kind of apt."

"Okay, I'll remember that." 

"Good. When we walk in I want to start playing straight away. I need to spank you and then I'm going to have my wicked way with you, but there are going to be some rules. Are you up for that?"

"Oh, yes, yes I am." He was already getting excited, I could see it in his eyes. 

"Okay, then. You will call me Mistress at all times. When you get in you'll go straight up to my bedroom, strip naked, and kneel at the end of the bed. You will wait for me there. You will do everything I say, when I say it and you won't answer back. You will only speak when spoken to. Am I clear?"

"Yes, Mistress," he replied, breathily, without a moment's pause. I could feel the sexual sparks in the air around us and I could not wait to get him home. 

"Oh, and if at any time you want to stop the game, say ‘gym. ' Okay?"

"Yes, Mistress." He said it louder that time, growing in confidence and eagerness. Our strides lengthened, our hands still entwined. Both of us were eager to get inside and let the games begin. 

I fumbled with my handbag when we got to my door. I'd like to say I did it on purpose, to drive him wild with anticipation, but I was just over excited and my hands were shaking. I eventually got the key into the lock and opened the front door. I held it open for John and he did exactly as told. He walked into the hall and literally ran upstairs. I walked into the living room and dropped my handbag onto the sofa. I took a breath to steady myself then started peeling off layers. 

Not that there were many layers to lose. Even in the brutal north of England, August is hot. I had only taken out a light cardigan to cover the tops of my arms from the prying eyes of strangers. Beneath that was a light, sleeveless dress. I dropped them both and left them in a pool on the living room floor. As I had been mad at John when I dressed, I didn't have on the sexiest underwear in the world. Plain, white cotton knickers and a matching white bra. They were more practical than kinky, but I had no time to change and all my sexy undies were in the bedroom anyway. I shook my head, took a deep breath and walked upstairs.