EXCERPT FROM "Crank Me Up"

“Well, do you think your sister would be happy that you don’t go out anymore? Have fun?”

“Probably not, but that’s the way it is right now. Maybe when Tonya turns eighteen, I’ll think about it.”

“Oh, now, we can’t have that.” I righted my chair, placed my now empty beer bottle on the table, and leaned forward, going for broke. “I like guys, too, you know? Maybe we can go together, choose our marks, just like you and Xena used to do. I haven’t been on a date in forever, so I am as out of touch as you are.” He didn’t look as shocked at my suggestion as I thought he would be. I became suspicious.

“Wait, why aren’t you freaking out right now?”

“Why would I freak ... Oh, you mean because you said you’re gay? I already knew that. That’s one of the first things that came out of Sherie’s mouth when she and Tonya started to spend time together over here. She asked me if I was gay, too, and would I like to date her daddy?” He winked at me -- yup, winked -- and drained his beer. I was mortified.

“She did not! That little ...”

“No, it’s okay. I didn’t affirm or deny. I just smiled and told her to go on back with Tonya and have fun.”

“Christ, that child has a mouth on her. Whatever. Really, the offer is good for whenever you want to. Momma would be happy to babysit both girls. She would probably even give us the spending money just out of sheer happiness that I finally did something other than work, sleep, and hang out with just the two of them. What do you say?”

He placed his empty bottle on the table and said “Yes. Okay. I think I can do this. When?” He took his cell phone out of his pocket, apparently to look up his schedule. Organized to a fault, that man.

“Next Saturday night okay, nine o’clock?”

“Yeah, that’ll work. My next software upgrade onsite won’t be until Tuesday, so I’ll have enough time to prepare.” He saved the appointment date in his calendar, then put away his phone. I shook my head and smiled.

“Wow, so efficient. I suppose you’ll schedule the purchase of condoms and lube on your calendar, too?” Yes, I was evil, but this was fun and so unexpected.

He was quick to respond, however, completely deadpan. “Of course, I will. But only the condoms, since I already have small packets of lube in my bedside table, along with a few dildos.”

I almost fell out of my chair. The idea of his ass spread and lubed up with a big, fat dildo shoved up there was ... dayum.

“Touché,” I responded, and got up from the table. “I’ll get back to you next week about Saturday night. Thanks again for the meal, and have a nice night.” I held my hand out to shake his. Xavier’s hand was firm and warm in my grasp.

“It was my pleasure,” he replied.