With the help of her gay sibling, Monty Mennemeyer, Andrea "Andie" crashes the party of aging Hollywood matinee idol, Darin Drake, in hopes of getting into show biz with her Elvis impersonation. That is only the beginning of this comedy/satire, a raunchy romp that revolves around the themes of wanting to be a movie star, over-the-top plastic surgery, and the tangled relationships of numerous characters. You will love Andie and her extraordinarily talented brother, Monty; Dr. Harrison Greenwood, with his rather extreme ideas about plastic surgery; Janice Cottenbell, his devoted nurse who was part of a pay-off in a malpractice suit; Darlene Damingford, the 4th or 5th (nobody can remember!) trophy wife of Hollywood mogul and studio head, Ralph Damingford; Nathan Naples, an actor who can only work in horror films since his last facelift; Inspector Red Herring who is trying to figure it all out, but cannot get a clue; as well as other crazy characters who are involved in murder, blackmail, highly illegal surgery techniques and other wacky and covert goings-on.
As the two came into Beauty's dressing room, Monty and Robin locked gazes and didn't take their eyes from the other. Darin, noting this, looked positively stricken. "There should be something in this for me!" he wailed. As Darin slunk away, Beauty motioned Andie to her. "I would love to make out with you, sweetie. You are simply too precious for words, but I have to keep my makeup and hairdo intact, so just kneel down on the floor there and slide my gown up. That's right, dah'ling, careful now, mustn't get it wrinkled," Beauty cautioned, as Andie eagerly did as instructed.
In a nearby corner, Monty and Robin were discovering each other.
Darin crouched outside the dressing room, his eye planted to a wide crack. Monty had been exquisite, and now it looked as if he had lost him to Robin Fingertoe, who was only a hairdresser. However, in this town, a hairdresser today could mean a Hollywood director tomorrow.
Beauty writhed in the makeup chair, hips rolling like a ship pitching on the tall seas.
Out of view of the other couple, Monty and Robin fell behind Beauty's chair rocking and rolling on the floor.
"Wanted on the set!" a voice called. "Beauty Beaufort wanted on the set!" The door opened and a young stagehand stuck in his head, taking in the scene without batting an eye.
"Not till I cum!" Beauty answered, thrashing about. With a loud scream, she collapsed back in the chair. A moment later, she sat up with a brilliant smile. "I'm ready for my close-up."
"Wait a minute!" Andie said, catching hold of Beauty's skirt. "What about me?"
"Oh this won't take long, dah'ling. I'll get you off as soon as I finish the scene."