It was the moment I read my little T’s messages for the fifth time and couldn’t help but feel so proud that I realized how far gone I already was. Calling T my little already in my head! What was I thinking? I didn’t even know if T was a little boy or a little girl. But how far they had come in those past few days ... especially considering that prior to their flatmate’s intervention, T had led a pretty secluded, shy life. And now here they were ordering a binkie online! It was a big step.

Jason nudged me then, and I lapsed back into the present.

“I hope your silence doesn’t mean that you don’t like the food I cooked,” he prompted slyly, knowing full well that I adored his cooking skills. I was as good a cook as any, I suppose, but Jason surpassed all my skills by far. He was a genius in the kitchen.

“Jason,” I replied earnestly, “this is the best pumpkin stew I have ever eaten, and the corn bread is just as delicious. You know I love your cornbread. Thank you both for inviting me tonight.”

I looked from Jason to Shai, his partner of twelve years, to convey my gratitude even as I took another bite of my favourite cornbread. It was less than eight hours that I had stepped off the plane from Shanghai, and I ached for my own bed and uninterrupted sleep. But spending the evening with my close friends and not having to eat out again was worth feeling exhausted.

We chit-chatted about work, my last trip to China and my upcoming one to Los Angeles, as well as Jason’s latest nightmare at the restaurant he owned. It was usually a quiet, smooth running business, but they had had trouble finding a decent chef after the last one had married and moved out of town. Apparently, the latest hire had not been a great match either.

“Are you staying in town this weekend?” Jason asked me.

“Yeah. Just the weekend, though. I have a gig in LA starting Monday. Shoe company start-up.”

“The usual?” Shai asked.

I nodded. The usual meant a three-day seminar for the CEOs and business owners. Then a two-day training for the rest of the staff.

“Good,” Jason grinned. “Then rest up tonight and then it’s a club weekend for all of us. And no excuses, Gareth! You need to get back into the swing of things, and you know I’m right. Ain’t I right, baby boy?”

“You are so right, Daddy,” Shai replied dutifully.

Shai refilled our glasses and I patiently waited for Jason to beg me for details about my online activities. I wasn’t going to volunteer that kind of private information, but I still knew Jason would make me spill the beans before long. I had told him I had met someone online and he was anxious to see me hop back in the dating scene after having been single for so long. He looked out for his friends, and that was one reason why I cherished his company so much.

I didn’t need to wait much longer. Dessert was brought in, and the questions arrived alongside.

I tried to answer as truthfully as I could; because they were my closest friends and I didn’t want to have secrets from them ... and because Shai would have called me out, if I had tried to weasel my way out of talking about my feelings.

When Jason went to get us another round of beer and Shai fetched his sippy cup for his chocolate milk, I checked my phone and wasn’t disappointed: This is me and my first ever binkie! My name is Tobias, by the way. What may I call you?

He was gorgeous. It didn’t matter that the photo was a little blurry and taken in poor lighting. There he was, my little Tobias, proudly displaying his binkie, barely able to hide a big, happy smile.

I instantly replied: What a sweet little boy you are, Tobias. I like what I’m seeing. My name is Gareth, but you can also call me Daddy or Sir, if you want to try it out.

“What are you smiling at?” Shai asked on his return. “Happy news?”

“You can say so,” I grinned. There was no point in pretending I wasn’t over the moon like a smitten teenager.