Greg, a registered nurse, works a lot of hours. When he comes home after a long day, he expects his house to be neat and tidy because the last thing he wants to worry about is housekeeping. His roommate, Kurt, however, is a total slob. Greg tries talking to his younger, less-responsible roomie, but Kurt is ambivalent. When Kurt throws a party and trashes the house the day before Greg’s parents are due for a visit, Greg considers throwing him out. Instead, he devises a better, more erotic punishment, one which they both enjoy... and as a result, they have a spanking good time and the house remains tidy forever more.
Kurt was sick of having such a fucking slob for a roommate. Everywhere he turned, chaos reigned. Dirty dishes in the sink. Stinky, smelly socks on the living room floor. If Kurt didn’t do the vacuuming himself, it would never get done. And he didn’t even want to think about that nasty bathroom. Sure, Kurt had his own private bathroom in his master bedroom, but the main bathroom that his roommate used constantly remained a pig sty.
Kurt became particularly frustrated by the fact that Greg was such a nice guy. And cute. Beyond cute, really. He was adorable. In fact, for this reason alone Kurt had let his guard down and had taken the kid on as a roommate. Sure, he was motivated in part by the financial benefit. Greg paid monthly rent and contributed money for groceries and utilities, and he was pretty reliable in that sense. There’d been a couple times when he was late a day or two on the rent due to the way his paydays happened to fall. But the thing that had swayed Kurt toward his final decision to take Greg in as a boarder was that sweet, innocent smile of his. He had wavy blond hair and piercing blue eyes, not to mention a tight little swimmer’s build that he liked to show off.
“Dude, listen. I gotta talk to you about something,” Kurt said. He was standing in the doorway of Greg’s bedroom, scanning the mess, his mouth falling open in shocked disbelief. The room looked as if a cyclone had hit.
“Sure, man,” Greg said. He was sitting on his bed, wearing only underwear and holding a video game controller in his hand. He didn’t look up to meet Kurt’s gaze, because that would have required he tear his eyes away from the TV screen, which Kurt knew was not gonna happen in the middle of a game.
Kurt cleared his throat, waiting impatiently.
Greg hit the pause button and placed the controller on the bed beside him. “Sorry, man,” he said. A lock of his blond hair swept down over his eye, and he tossed his head back just slightly. “What’s up?”
“My parents are stopping by tomorrow, and I need the house cleaned.”
Greg smiled and shrugged his shoulders. “Sure, man, no problem. I’ll tidy up a bit.”
“A bit?” Kurt looked around the room, disgusted by the stacks of dirty dishes and silverware. Cereal bowls, glasses, plates with leftover spaghetti sauce and macaroni and cheese. “Dude, this room should be condemned. Look at all these nasty dishes that’ve been in here for God knows how long. And the clothes... I mean, come on. Do you ever do laundry? And it stinks!”
Greg chuckled, unfazed. “I know... I been meaning to clean this up. I promise I’ll get to it later today—or tomorrow morning.”
“Today!” Kurt demanded. “And the bathroom, too.”
Greg made a face. “But I’m in the middle of a competition...”
“Today!” Kurt repeated. “There’s no way you’ll have time tomorrow morning. Look, I have to work a twelve-hour shift at the hospital tonight. I won’t be here to babysit you, but when I come home in the morning, this place better be clean. I’ll only have about three hours to sleep and get myself cleaned up in the before my folks get here.”
“Okay, man... I’ll get right on it.”
“Good. I’m headed out, then. I got the living room and kitchen already taken care of. Just don’t mess ’em up, and concentrate on getting your room and bathroom done.”
Greg nodded. “Got it, dude. Not a problem. You can count on me.” And then he smiled. That smile of his was so innocent and so charming that Kurt was completely disarmed.
“All right. Bye.”
* * * *
As soon as Greg heard the front door close, he got up and stumbled to the living room. He picked up the remote control for the stereo and cranked it to high, then made his way to the kitchen. He pulled out a half gallon container of orange juice from the fridge, tipped it up to his mouth, and took a huge swig directly from the carton.
Man, that Kurt was a pain sometimes. Nice enough guy, but he was so fucking anal about everything. Yeah, well, whatever. He’d have plenty of time later to get the cleaning bullshit done. For now, though, he had the place all to himself.
He stepped over to the counter where his phone was plugged in. Picking it up, he called his friend Ty. “Dude, what’s up? Hey, wanna come over?”
Within a half hour the house was swarming with college-aged kids, all ready to party. And party they did. Someone brought a keg, and later they got pizza. By eleven o’clock that night, everyone was trashed and the keg was nearly empty. This didn’t stop them, though. One of the guys volunteered to get more beer, and they decided to start a game of quarter bounce.
By three in the morning, Greg and Ty were curled up together on Greg’s single bed. Ty had just finished sucking him off, and Greg was pretty wasted. “Dude, that was awesome,” he whispered.
“You’re the one who’s awesome,” Ty said, slurring his words.
“Hey, man, we gotta get up early and clean this place up before my roommate gets home. He’s gonna kill me.”
“Sure, man,” Ty said, yawning. “No problem.”
Greg pulled Ty into his arms, squeezing him tightly against his chest. “Cool,” he said, and that was the last he remembered before dozing off to sleep.